Lollipops turn into cigarettes. The innocent ones turn into sluts. Homework goes in the trash. Mobile phones are being used in class. Detention becomes suspension. Soda becomes vodka. Bikes become cars. Kisses turn into sex. Remember when getting high meant swinging on the playground? When protection meant wearing a helmet? When the worst things you could get from boys were cooties? Dad’s shoulders were the highest place on earth and mum was your hero? Your worst enemies were your siblings. Race issues were about who ran the fastest. War was only a card game. And the only drug you knew was cough medicine. When wearing a skirt didn’t make you a slut. The most pain you felt was when you skinned your knees, and goodbyes only meant until tomorrow? And we couldn't wait to grow up.
Sometimes I wonder why it is that I'm so reluctant to grow up. This Peter Pan syndrome has become a part of me.. this childishness... I've never been the type who couldn't wait to grow up. And it's never been a problem, until now.
In under three months, I will no longer be a teenager. I will lose the privileges of being a child. I will gain responsibility, and have to accept rationality with open arms. And I shudder at the thought. Slowly, I am losing my innocence... As I increasingly try to fake innocence, I realise this is a losing battle.
One day, nothing I do will be good enough. I will be an adult. And as for the rewards of being an adult? Are there any?
No comments:
Post a Comment